Monday, March 29, 2010

The Deadly Disease

Ever heard of a rove beetle?

No..?
Then..what about.."charlie"?

If yes..then this motherfucker really deserves the award of the "most fucking bug" in the whole world.


"Congratulations. Mr.Charlie."

Why, you might ask?

For instance,
Mr. Charlie has a type of venom, which is more dangerous than cobra's venom..which Mr.Charlie could spray on humans using his stinger.
WTF, right?


"You are a demon!"

Mr.Charlie is a type of beetle, (although it looks like an ant) and usually lives in school fields and areas.

The most common affected people is people from boarding school..and the effects of Charlie's venom is not what you wanna mess with.


"Mr. Charlie's Victim and the scars from the effects of Charlie's venom"

Beware Of Charlie!

Friday, March 26, 2010

Saodah

One day..one of the fist uk boys, saw a pondan, from Sunway.
That pondan gave him her number through his car window, and, after a month later..


XXXXX!!!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

How To Get 4 Flat In Your Exams. (Not A Silly Post).

So exam is coming, your head is so messed up. You want to get A.

Badly.

But.
How to get it? (Without going to class, at all. 100% guaranteed).
P:S// Results varies with individual.

Here's Some UseFul Tips..
(Take note of everything we say. We are all 4flat students, 10A+ SPM Scorers And Scholarship Holders-wahahahahah).

1. First, get up early and reserve your seats!

2. Second, build your "Pentagon".


"Put the smartest guy in the middle in all subjects, and 5 other people who wants to lihat sebelah"

3. Third, chase away parasites. (People who dont contribute to your pentagon and people who will backstab you, as in, doesnt want to give their answers to you).

4. Bring lots of empty paper.

"Those empty papers would come in handy. Seriously."

5. When in trouble, summon your "TOYOL".

"Get creative. Dont do stupid stuff by texting your friends for answers. It just wont work. You will destroy all your teammates hardwork"

6. Be Proffesional.

7. And lastly..during the last 10minutes of the exam, try not to chicken out, be cool, relax, take a deep breath..
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
And steal your friends answer, swiftly.

The End Result;

"Tell your mom that you get an A in maths. Congratulations."

Monday, March 22, 2010

Students Life In KMKN (Fist Uk Boys-Weekends, Friday)

6.30A.M
Jana Taqwa Rescue starts to wake up people sleeping.




7.00A.M
Wake up. Pray.
7.02A.M
Get back to sleep.
12.00P.M
Wake up, shower, get dressed with baju melayu and samping.
12.40P.M
Lunch at DS, Briyani.
1.00P.M

0.5km walk to the nearest mosque for chendol.


1.05P.M
Buy pulut chendol.
1.06P.M
Finished my pulut chendol.
1.07P.M
Seek for friend's chendol.




1.15P.M
Arrive at mosque.
1.17P.M
Sleep.
1.30P.M
(Suddenly people start to rise, praying). Wake up from sleep, pray.
1.50P.M
0.5km walk to KMKN.
2.10P.M
One piece/Naruto at computer kiosk.




2.30P.M
Dota
5.30P.M
Futsal/Rugby/Tennis/Dota



6.40P.M
Dinner, Shower
7.40P.M
Pray
7.42P.M
Sambung Dota. PES. Football Manager. Guitar Hero.
12A.M
Sleep.
12.01A.M
Opps, malam masih muda.



12.02A.M
Search for rooms watching movies.
12.10A.M
Watch movie.
2.00A.M
Dota
6.00A.M
Jana Taqwa Rescue again starts to wake up people.
6.10A.M
Pray
6.15A.M
Sleep.

Students Life In KMKN (Fist Uk Boys-Weekdays)

6.30A.M
Wake up. Snooze alarm. Get back to sleep-again.




6.50A.M
Wake up. Snooze alarm again. Sleep.
7.A.M
Wake up. Take towel and go to shower/toilet.
7.15A.M
Get dressed. Pray.
7.20A.M
Shut my ears from hearing the daily announcement to clear your room before 7.40 A.M.
7.30A.M
Breakfast at DS. (If i am lucky).
7.45A.M
Lepak at Ko-Op. Pau friend's dutch ladies milk.
8.00A.M
Lecture starts.
8.30A.M
The sleeping organization, starts doing their "work".



video

11.00A.M
Recess. Cafe/DS
11.30A.M
Tutorial class. Do homework/assignments.



1.30P.M
Afternoon Recess. Lunch.
1.50P.M
Back to dorm, sleep/dota.
2.30P.M
Classes.
4.30P.M
College hell Ends.
4.45P.M
Dota
5.30P.M
Futsal/Rugby/Tennis
Hearing voices such as "terbaek, serious ah, balak" is a must. (I get annoyed each time i hear those sounds)
6.30P.M
Dinner
7.00P.M
Dota/Poker




7.30P.M
Shower.
8.00P.M
Prep at Faris's room.




8.30P.M
Announcement to clear your room from the Head Fellow, if caught, you'll get "hambat".
8.35P.M
Close the light.
8.40P.M
Open the corridors light.
8.45P.M
Quickly hide inside the locker/under the bed. (When i hear footsteps and voices "LAJU2, ni nak kene hambat nih") If not, continue prep.
10.00P.M
Get raped by Faris/Mat.
10.30P.M
Supper. Cuci mata.
11.00P.M
Dota
12.00A.M
Sleep

Life In College

School is over. Received your SPM result.
Wow, 10 A+?! Nobody gives a shit.
After approximately 15years studying, you arrive in college.
Thinking the name "college", it makes you wonder..
  • Will i get to mingle around with hot chicks?
  • Will i get the freedom that i really wanted?
  • Will i get the shits out of college?
Well, some college, their answer is "yes", while some, are "not".

"Think again, before going to college"

Stuck here at KMKN(Kolej Mara Kuala Nerang), does reflects the term "college" in my mind.
Why, you might ask?

"Is this is what you call as a lecture hall!!! >:("

"UiTM's hall is much more spacious, FFS"

Well, for instance,

  • You will never get the freedom that you want!
  • You will never get to mingle around with hot chicks. (You will get expelled for that).
  • You cant study in your room during weekdays at night. (A boner, fuck that).
  • You can only play sports at 5.30pm UNTIL 6.30p.m. (An hour of madness).
  • Besides, staying at KMKN, meaning that you need approximately 1 hour to go the nearest city! (Where you could atleast cuci your eyes and mind you, going to the city is once in two weeks! WTF???)
  • And, you will get splashed with "horlick basi" on your birthday. (Complementary, ofcourse)

Etc..etc.
"Getting caught late by the lecturers/wardens would mean running around the tennis court"

But still, i'm loving the life here in KMKN.

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